Psychotherapist's Journal - Thoughts and Tools to Inspire Wellness in Mind and Body - by Karen Gorrin

Mind-Body Wellness Workshops at the Sammamish Club

Join me at the Sammamish Club this fall to learn about the relationship between thoughts, emotions, and physical health. We'll discuss recent modern science discoveries that you can utilize to optimize your own health and well-being.

Choose your session:
Wednesday, October 15 at 7:00 PM
Saturday, November 15 at 1:00 PM
Wednesday, December 3 at 9:30 AM

Where:

The NEW Mind-Body-Energy Studio
The Sammamish Club
2115 NW Poplar Way 
Issaquah, WA 98027

Fee:
$40. The cost of this workshop may be applied towards Thrive, the 8-week wellness program designed to create harmony in mind and body coming to the Sammamish Club in January 2008-created and facilitated by Karen Gorrin.

Facilitated by Karen Gorrin 

For more information or to register, contact Karen Haigler, Aquatics and Programs Director. To learn about the Sammamish Club, click here.

Friends Make Life Sweet

There is nothing as comfy as spending time with good friends. I am blessed with having a community of special women and men I call "friend." What about you? Did you know the quality of our friendships, also known as our "social support system," plays an important role in our health and well-being?

Friends increase our sense of belonging, purpose and self-worth. In fact, just knowing there are people in our lives to turn towards in times of distress actually strengthens our resilience and reduces our experience of stress.

Some people benefit from having a large and diverse social support system, while others prefer a smaller circle of friends and acquaintances. Whether one friend or twenty, studies show it is our perception of the quality of our social support system that most influences our immune function.

All About Not Knowing

“… Not knowing – the answer, the goal, or even the next step – is generally associated with deficit or failure in our culture. How then, do artists, writers, and other creative people cope with such indeterminacy, learning to live with the anxiety it produces and even coming to understand it as part of the creative process? …”

These were the opening words I shared at the Thriving Beyond Cancer: Thriving in Uncertainty workshop I facilitated last year at Harmony Hill Retreat Center. The insightful author of those words was the UCLA Fowler Museum staff from long-ago exhibit materials.

How relevant to the artist, this idea of not-knowing. How relevent to us all, as we create our lives one day at a time. One moment at a time. The perpetual blank page. The on-going creative process.

Have you ever noticed the tendency to avoid "not knowing" by placing something ontop, as a way to try and make not-knowing into the known? How does that work for you? I welcome your thoughts.

I will be offering this program again soon ... Monday, April 28. You are welcomed to attend this program at no-cost if you are a cancer survivor or a cancer caregiver; and you are physically able to move between buildings and short distances. For more information or to register, click here. Hope to see you there.

Hooray Martha Beck

I could not have written the article better myself. A big "hooray" goes to Martha Beck for her March 2002 article, re-published this month on CNN.com/living (where I first read it) Is it Love or a Mutual Strangulation Society? Beck details what it takes to have an honest and lasting relationship. Be aware, these ideas may challenge your beliefs and might even feel a little uncomfortable. Many of us hold the idea that our partner should be, or must be, EVERYTHING to us. But it simply does not work that way. Here's what Beck reports, and I agree, are the five statements we must be able to recite about our partner:

I can live without you, no problem.

My love for you will definitely change.

You're not everything I need.

I won't always hold you close.

You and I aren't one.

What are your thoughts on this?

Can you use the above statements to describe your most intimate relationship? Does your relationship consist of two whole and separate people coming together, or have you/do you give up a sense of yourself as an individual to merge with your partner? I believe we sometimes get confused about the difference between healthy intimacy and unhealthy (and ultimately unsatisfying) enmeshment. I know, these ideas may push a few buttons. It's OK. I welcome your comments.

All About Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue: The Mind/Body Connection

Last night I enjoyed the opportunity to meet and hear Jacob Teitelbaum, MD speak about Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue at the Seattle Public Library. Teitelbaum is the medical director of the Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Centers and is a patient consultant that specializes in the treatment of these conditions. He also authored From Fatigued to Fantastic among other titles.

The focus of Dr. Teitlebaum's talk was the treatment protocol he refers to as SHIN: Sleep, Hormonal Deficiencies, Infections, and Nutritional Deficiencies. If FMS/CFS are an "energy crisis," Dr. Teitelbaum believes it's possible to turn the circuit breakers back ON. Included in his talk was reference to the Mind/Body connection. Here are the qualities Dr. Teitelbaum tends to see in the psychology of his patients:

Low Self Esteem
Overachiever Seeking Approval Where It's Never Received
Trying to be All Things to All People
Taking Care of Others at the Expense of the Self
Unable to say NO

From my own clinical experience, I agree with his conclusions. I'll take a step further to say that the majority of clients I have seen with a FMS/CFS diagnosis have also lived with chronic stress, often related to childhood neglect or abuse, or due to a sudden traumatic event, and many describe poor attachment to their primary caregivers, a contributing factor to developing chronic stress and the sense of aloneness and uncertainty about oneself and the world.

Naturally, this profile does NOT match everyone diagnosed with fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue. But it does point to common mind/body aspects of the illness for many people. It also suggests the necessity of a multi-modality approach to healing.

I consistently use the mind/body psychotherapy Lifespan Integration when working with clients with the kind of trauma described above. Lifespan Integration helps to heal past hurts without re-traumatizing. It is especially helpful for relieving anxiety, lifting depression, and helping people re-connect with themselves and their bodies. Mindfulness Meditation also helps to reduce stress and restore people's ability to connect with themselves, and to self soothe. I believe these treatment modalities, when used together with protocols like the SHIN recommendations, can offer a very gentle yet powerful healing.

Thank you, Dr. Teilebaum, for recognizing the deep connection of mind and body in the healing journey from illness to wholeness. It was a pleasure to meet you!

All About Grief and Loss: Acceptance

Our ability, or inability, to accept the loss of what we had, and the loss of what will never be, is at the heart of much of the suffering in our world. Certainly, loss and grief in one form or another is the primary issue that brings people to the psychotherapist's office.

The Buddha said it well, "There is suffering." He named this fact as the first of the Four Noble Truths. He also said it was possible to relieve ourselves from suffering by accepting things just the way they are.

This can be a little tricky to do, because many of us hold a "story" in our minds that limit out ability to accept. The story usually goes something like this: "If I accept this, I will give it power, or I will make it more real. The story continues by convincing us that if we were to "act as though it isn't true," eventually the suffering would go away. Ahhh, wish that it were so simple.

The mind can be tricky indeed. Calming these stories and returning our attention to the present moment is what mindfulness meditation practice is all about. We do this because the stories are not true. We do this because to pretend our reality into existence does not work. That's the thing about denial. It may seem to work, at least for awhile. But eventually, what is real and true catches up with us.

Eventually, we come to know that when we accept things exactly the way they are, they change. When we meet the circumstances of our lives, just exactly "as is", without judgement, we release the story line and our grasp to the past. We become "unstuck," allowing ourselves to be present to the unfolding of our lives.

It is natural for some amount of discomfort to float through from time to time. That is part of being alive. The story line would suggest that if we were to deny these uncomfortable feelings, we would prevent them from growing and taking over. Not so. The effort we expand to "push away the feelings" often encourages the feelings to become louder. The helpful choice would be to meet the discomfort when it arises, then in the next moment to focus our attention on what happens there. Likely, the next moment will bring something new entirely.

This is the practice of meditation. This is the journey of being alive. This is the path of relief from the suffering of loss and grief.

Colleague Projects: Integrative Healing

Some of my friends/colleagues are working on very exciting integrative healing projects, and I want to take this opportunity to tell you about some of them:

Esther Cohen, director of Seven Bowls School of Nutrition, Nourishment, and Healing, will be offering Energy Medicine, Nourishment & Personal Healing Energetics of food, Introduction to the Vibrational Body February 21-25, 2007 in Longmont, Colorado.

Leesa Sklover-Filgate, psychologist and music therapist at Optiself Center for Counseling and Wellness in Connecticut and New York, was in the pacific northwest last week to record her new chanting CD with all-inspiring musician Jim Nollman. Leesa shared the rough cut with me as we sat drinking lattes at Elliot Bay Books. Let's just say tingles of recognition swirled through my body, as Leesa's angelic voice joined the sounds of whales, lobster, and glaciers in perfect harmonic resonance.

Kudos to both of you, for following your heart's desire while helping to transform our world.

Announcing Abundant Wellness Retreats

I founded Olive Tree Healing Arts with the vision to offer workshops and retreats. That's why I am excited to write about the first of these projects, the Abundant Wellness Retreat For Women Living with Fibromyalgia. We will offer two pacific northwest sessions in 2007. The dates are April 27-29 and September 28-30.

Joining me to facilitate these retreats will be Melode Brewer, my friend, colleague, and yoga instructor. Melode is one of those special people who create calm and peace just by entering a room. I feel blessed to be working with her again, and I believe retreat participants will also benefit from her presence and gentle approach.

We are equally blessed to have reserved Harmony Hill Retreat Center as our venue. Located on the south shore of the Hood Canal with spectacular views of the Olympic Mountains, Harmony Hill is the ideal setting for healing mind, body, and spirit. I encourage you to take a look at their website and you will see what I mean. I have also included a photo here to give you an idea of the beautiful setting.

Why Abundant Wellness Retreats? Having worked in psychosocial oncology for several years, I have been impressed with the community's commitment to provide psycho-social-spiritual support services to people with a cancer diagnosis. I have also been saddened to notice the lack of such support programs for people living with other chronic and life-threatening conditions. The Abundant Wellness Retreat was created to help fill this gap.

While our first retreats are designed for women living with Fibromyalgia, the vision is to offer Abundant Wellness retreats for people living with Multiple Sclerosis, Parkinson's, Lupus, and other conditions that benefit from gentle movement and reducing stress. The retreats will also serve to connect people with others who share part of their life experience. It is believed that our perception of the quality of our support community has a good deal of influence on our health and well-being. What better way to strengthen one's support community than to connect with people who "get it"?

Please contact me if you would like to help bring an Abundant Wellness Retreat to your community. More information can be found on my website. Here is the brochure: Download abundant_wellness_brochure_fibromyalgia_final.pdf